here I sit

Still.  I made it to work for all of 4 hours today until my head was spinning so much I had to rest it on my desk.  So home I went.  To an overly excited pit bull and a warm bed.  After lazing around, I said "MEGAN!  YOU SHALL EAT." So I ate.  And I didn't hate it.  Which is the first time in a while that I'm not kicking myself for eating.  The dizziness has subsided as long as my body is not perpendicular to the floor [I'm big into slouching these days].  Sometimes I swear I can feel the rotation of the earth when I'm dizzy.  That makes me dizzier.  It's a vicious cycle.

Now I'm off to do more lounging.  Maybe clean up my horrible mess of a kitchen.  Take the garbage out.  Watch Doctor Who. We'll see.

Side note, it's one of my dearest friend's twenty fifth birthday today.  We grew up together, more like sisters or cousins than friends.  It's crazy to me that we have shared 25 years together.  I look forward to another 75.

Happy Birthday Courtnie!

sitting around

Is what I've been doing.  Laying more like it.  Lounging.  Waiting to feel better, to find out what is going on inside of me, for the doctor to tell me I can go back to work.

They told me I had a ruptured ovarian cyst [which hurt a lot].  But they can't tell me why I'm still in pain. And why I can't stand up and walk around without feeling like I'm going to fall down and sleep forever.  Or why I can't get my blood pressure up to normal levels.  I usually run low, but 86/43 is too low even for me.

I'm so tired of drinking water.

A little check list of my week so far:

-1 ambulance ride-

-3 days of work missed-

-3 IVs that infiltrated-

-5 vials of blood drawn-

-1 ultrasound-

-1 CT scan that involved 2 IVs-

-countless days of nausea and dizziness-

-approximately 20 hours [and counting] cuddling the sleepiest pit bull-

-2 killer headaches-

-7 days of antibiotic that is disgusting-

The most recent inflitration.  It's all swollen and nasty.

Lady is in heaven.  I'm just ready to get back to life.  Forcing food down my throat is getting old.  By the way, veganism is going great...  Also this illness isn't from my sudden change in diet according to the doctors since I've been feeling on the verge of unwell for a couple of weeks now.  

Someone please bring me a cookie.  And some crackers.  Thanks.

rain

It's raining to beat the band tonight.  Standing water on the road type of rain.  All the trees and grass are brilliantly green type of rain.  

[That hedge needs a trim...]

But the rain caused something so awful to happen today.  It caused a gravel slide in a park that I used to drive by almost every day.  It caused a child to die, and one is missing.  Goodness I hope they find that child okay.  It's heartbreaking when natural disasters happen like this.  First the horrible tornado situation in Oklahoma, which took so many children's lives.  And then a gravel slide into the Mississippi river.  More children taken.  More hearts broken.  

Information about the gravel slide.

Praying for all the children lost, gone, and being missed tonight.

this just in

We're strongly considering partaking in a vegan challenge for various reasons [more on this to come maybe?]

The jury is still out on if you'll ever get me to eat quinoa.  

That is all.

This was taken this weekend.  Hanging out with 8th-going-on-9th graders is the best.  

fuggy

Which means warm and muggy in my head.  And maybe I read something like it somewhere but now I walk into a room and say "ergh, it's fuggy in here." Which in turn makes people go "huh?"  Which is okay I guess.

There are three words I say far too often both in conversation and in writing.  They are as follows; which, but, and also.  I'm working on it.

Today was a weird day for me.  I had vertigo all day from goodness knows what, so I took some Benadryl because, honestly, I take Benadryl for just about everything...  So I was out. of. it.  But it helped with the dizziness.  Then I was on a phone call and the person I was talking to was hardcore recruiting me to join his company.  He wanted me to relocate which I told him isn't exactly feasible at the moment because the old husband has a kick bum job here and I can't make him move.  Then I texted that same elderly husband about the phone call and he immediately looked up job postings in that area.  My response was very surprising to me.

I put on the brakes.  Said "hold the phone, Stan!" And felt weirdly nostalgic about this town that I degrade on the daily.  What!?  Megan, you can't possibly like it here.  Not enough to stay forever.  But the idea of leaving right now, or within the next couple of months.  Unfathomable.  So I learned that about myself today.  It's always enlightening to discover what you truly want, isn't it though?